I miss my future husband 🏹

or so I thought??

The other day I started journaling through some emotions as I normally do, and the thought that I wanted to write through was “wow, I miss my future husband” – if you’re a fellow hopeful romantic who longs to have a beautiful marriage, you may be able to relate to the feeling. That feeling where you just know he’s going to be, not only a man you’ve dreamed of, but that he would be better because you know and trust that God always gives good gifts to His children. That feeling of knowing you never have to wonder again about any man because God brought you your husband. I missed in advance that comfort, and while marriage comes with its own struggles, I missed that too. I yearn for the idea of praying through problems with my husband, and the list goes on. While I was just beginning this thought and starting to write them out, it was almost like the holy spirit intercepted my thought path. 

As I was writing this out I started to highlight the moments that I am grateful for right now and it shifted me completely and stopped me in my tracks. Here’s a piece of what that looked like actually: 

I rest assured that I am exactly where not only I need to be, but I am also very much where I WANT to be. You know ? Like I get to travel and I'm living my dream career as it’s unfolding. I look forward to the Lord allowing my husband to find me. But I also look forward to working in my field. Working while I wait. And working until the Lord sees fit. When the time comes, I’ll know because I know my Father will give me a peace that surpasses my understanding. 

As I wrote these words my emotions shifted. I went from feeling a little sad and maybe even defeated, to feeling encouraged.

In real time, I felt the encouragement from the Holy Spirit that kindly reminded me that my God is an on-time God. My God is working in and through me. Everything that I get to experience now are things that at some point were either a simple thought, or a fervent prayer.

I’m living a life that at one point was merely hypothetical and we’re only just getting started…

If my God has unraveled this very chapter for me, not when I asked specifically, but instead when I was better equipped to handle and steward it well, I can trust and believe that the same will be when the time comes for the meeting of my husband. In the meantime, I will continue to ask the Lord to prepare my heart, and to teach me how to pray for my husband. I will speak Jesus over my husband (whomever he is) and over my children. I will bless his journey, wherever he may be. I will ask the Lord to help me become the woman worth being at the side of one of His sons. This is now my fervent prayer, that I trust the Lord will unravel in His good and perfect timing. 

“So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him.”

‭‭Luke‬ ‭11‬:‭13‬ 

I’ve written before on how the Holy Spirit convicted me about my “rushing the current season” and friend, if this is for you, I pray you hear my heart when I leave you with this… Rather than get too caught up in what’s next, what are you being called to steward well in this season first?

The journey is constant, and a beautiful one at that. 

The beauty and kindness of our Father and the art of becoming.